Sometimes, the smallest requests reveal the biggest problems in a marriage, especially when one partner repeatedly refuses to make an effort over something that should bring the family together. After 17 years with her husband and 13 years of marriage, this 37-year-old woman is no longer asking for expensive gifts, romantic getaways, or extravagant celebrations. All she wants is an occasional sit-down restaurant meal with her husband and children, something she has requested for birthdays and anniversaries for years without success.
Although she describes her husband as a loving father and partner, his extreme frugality has turned even ordinary outings into stressful experiences. What hurts even more is that he willingly visits restaurants with his father when someone else pays. Now, she has started taking the children out herself, but their father’s constant complaints have begun affecting what they feel comfortable ordering.
After 17 Years Together And 13 Years Of Marriage, I Never Expected That Asking My Husband To Take Me Out To Dinner Would Become Such A Hopeless Battle
My Husband Is A Loving Father And A Good Partner In Many Ways, But When It Comes To Spending Money, He Becomes So Frugal That Even A Simple Family Dinner Feels Impossible
For Every Birthday And Anniversary, I Ask For Just One Simple Thing: A Sit-Down Restaurant Meal With My Husband Or Our Kids, Yet Years Keep Passing Without That Wish Being Fulfilled
I Have Made An Effort To Enjoy The Things He Loves, Even Watching Western Movies I Never Cared For, But He Refuses To Give My Favorite Shows, Anime, Or Video Games A Chance
Our Family Rarely Eats Out Because He Usually Limits Us To Drive-Thru Meals, Gas Station Snacks, Or Whatever Fast Food He Can Pick Up On His Way Home
Even When Our Daughter Gets Hungry During A Long Drive, He Questions Why She Did Not Eat Before We Left Instead Of Simply Letting Her Enjoy A Treat Along The Way
For Two Christmases In A Row, My Family Gave Us Restaurant Gift Cards, But They Sat Unused In My Wallet For Two Whole Years Because My Husband Would Not Take Us Out
Years Ago, After He Had Been Drinking, I Finally Asked Why He Would Not Take Me Out, Even Offering To Pay Or Use A Gift Card So Money Would Not Be An Excuse
On The Rare Occasions When We Actually Eat Out Together, He Makes Sure Everyone Knows How Unhappy He Is About The Cost, Even When The Difference Is Only A Few Dollars
The Worst Part Is That His Attitude Has Started Affecting Our Children, Who Now Study Menu Prices And Choose Cheaper Meals Instead Of Ordering What They Actually Want
My Husband Also Insists That He Takes Me Out For Birthdays And Anniversaries, But One Family Birthday Dinner Exposed Just How Different His Version Of Events Is From Reality
Let’s check out how Redditors are reacting to this situation.
For this mother, the issue has become much bigger than restaurant bills or disagreements about spending money. She has repeatedly tried to compromise, offered to pay herself, and even saved restaurant gift cards for years in the hope that her husband would finally agree to a simple family outing. Instead, she has been left feeling that spending time with her is an expense he would rather avoid.
His comments about food prices have also made their children increasingly hesitant to order what they actually want, leaving her heartbroken to see them worry about costs during an outing that should be enjoyable. By continuing to take them out with her own money, she believes she is giving them experiences they would otherwise miss. Still, she wonders whether excluding her husband is creating more distance in their marriage or simply refusing to let his financial habits control their lives.
