Sometimes a family disagreement starts with something incredibly small but quickly turns into a much bigger argument about boundaries, expectations, and who is actually responsible for a child. In this situation, OP had made plans specifically for her 10-year-old daughter and 8-year-old son, who both love playing Pokémon Go together. They had looked forward to Community Day all week, and OP was equally excited because she had spent most evenings working and had barely had quality time with them since school started. She had already arranged for her 5-year-old to stay with her mother because he does not enjoy the long walks involved in their Pokémon Go outings.
Then, while OP was at work on Friday night, her brother called with an unexpected request: his friend had dropped off his six-year-old son for the weekend, and he expected OP to watch him the next day. OP explained that she already had plans, while her mother was available to supervise the younger children. What followed was a flood of angry messages from her brother accusing her of being selfish for refusing to change her plans.
I Had Been Looking Forward To One Special Day With My Kids After An Exhausting Week Of Barely Seeing Them
Then Friday Night, While I Was Still At Work, My Brother Called And Dropped An Unexpected Childcare Problem Directly Into My Weekend Plans
My Mom Already Knew About My Plans With The Older Two Kids And Had Agreed To Stay With My Five-Year-Old, So She Was Also Completely Capable Of Looking After The Six-Year-Old
So Now I’m Sitting Here Wondering What Exactly I Was Supposed To Have Done Differently When Everyone Was Already Safe And The Original Plans Were Never A Secret
Curious to hear the verdict from Reddit on this one.
The disagreement ultimately seems to come down to whether OP should have been expected to change plans she had already made with her own children simply because her brother found himself responsible for someone else’s child. OP had not secretly abandoned anyone or left a child without supervision. Her mother was already prepared to stay with OP’s five-year-old and agreed to keep an eye on the six-year-old as well. She even took the younger children out for a Happy Meal and to the mall while OP went out with her older two children as planned.
From OP’s perspective, everything worked out safely, and her children still got the special day they had been anticipating all week. What frustrated her most was not necessarily being asked for help, but being treated as selfish when she declined to completely rearrange a commitment she had made to her own kids. Her brother, meanwhile, apparently expected her to include his friend’s child simply because the child had been dropped off for the weekend. With the younger children cared for and OP’s original plans intact, she is left wondering what she actually did wrong, and whether refusing an unexpected childcare responsibility really makes her the unreasonable one in this situation.
